Sunday, February 22, 2009

Am I a writer?

Sometimes I stop in the midst of sixty hour work weeks and all the responsibilities at home and reflect. It does not happen often enough, but it does happen. Right now, I am taking a minute to do that very thing, reflect.

Due to my schedule, I have not written any more in my novel for quite a while. Sure I have worked on a song or two and finished a second draft on a screenplay, but I'm not writing my book. What does that say about me?

Am I really a writer? Am I a wannabe? No easy answers are glancing against my grey matter. So I guess I should evaluate myself.

I have continued to write a weekly blog entry faithfully. Why this and not the novel? Perhaps I have reached a point in my book where I see the light at the end of the tunnel, and I fear the final result.

I have regularly said that I don't care as much about publication as I do about completing the novel. What if that is simply not true? Maybe I care more than I realized.

In the past I have used the logic that if I write regularly, I am a writer. Since I continue to blog and work on other material, I guess I still qualify by my own standard.

Self-doubt will continue to plague me and I will keep fighting back.

I will not give up on my dream, even while allowing my own humanity.

Until next time, lets keep on writing.

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